About Bridget

Bridget is an actress turned film student turned blogger who has a weak spot for Gordon Ramsay, 50% off sales, and stay-in movie nights with her boo. She's passionate about helping women find and release their inner bougie goddess with the least possible cash offering. Follow Bridget on Twitter and Instagram @brokebutbougie

Posts by Bridget:

LONELY

Loneliness

We’ve all been there. We put on a brave face at parties but all women – whether it’s stay at home moms or girls who work a forty hour week and have thousands of Facebook “friends” – we all feel lonely at some point.

Part of what makes us humans is our desire for connection. We are social beings that need human interactions to feel wanted, loved, and appreciated. Not to get too philosophical, but I’m pretty sure that Aristotle guy was on to something when he wrote about it thousands of years ago.  (Google: Humans are social beings – Aristotle)

Loneliness isn’t a situation it’s a feeling. And when I’m feeling lonely (I don’t know about you) I also feel unpopular, unwanted, always wrong and ugly.

There are usually a couple reasons I get the lonelys:

1. Somebody Hurts You –  When the people closest to us hurt us, it cuts deep. And it’s all downhill from there. It starts the cycle of feeling that you can’t trust anyone, nobody understands you, you’ll never have a good friend, and you’ll never really connect with anyone.

2. Embarrassment – If you claim that you don’t get embarrassed, you’re lying. We’ve all been embarrassed at some point. I feel like an isolated weirdo when I’m embarrassed in front of people I respect or love and all I want to do is go under my fuzzy green blanket and sleep for forever.

So, that’s all good and depressing. So, how do you stop feeling lonely? How do you pull yourself out of an isolating funk that just won’t quit? I’ve got a few ideas but I’d love to hear some of yours.

1. Do Unto Others – Whether I want to admit it or not, loneliness is a very selfish feeling. “Nobody loves me.” “I am so alone.” “Nobody wants to be my friend.” One way I’ve found that helps get my happy juices flowing is to do something for somebody else. It doesn’t have to be anything crazy. Bake cookies for someone, do the dishes for your roommate, donate soup to a homeless shelter. Anything! Get outside yourself. You might be surprised how you feel afterwards.

2. Sing. Sing really, really loud – Don’t even try to pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about. (I keep a hairbrush in my car. Can’t sing if you don’t have a mic, right?) Bump up the jams and sing like you’ve got pipes like Aretha Franklin. It’s okay to laugh at yourself. You may even find that you’re smiling by the chorus. Baby, you’re a firework.

3. Time out – Take a deep breath. Heck, take an hour and try to objectively look at why you feel lonely. Realize that you won’t always feel like this. Think about those times you felt truly loved and appreciated. Write them down if the mood strikes you! As Viola Davis says so eloquently in The Help,”You is kind. You is smart. You is important.” I know it’s hard, but try not to forget it.

Side note, it’s okay to cry. I’m pretty sure some scientist said that you are actually getting rid of toxins when you have a good cry. Let it out. Pope John Paul II said, “It’s better to cry than to be angry, because anger hurts others while tears flow silently through the heart and cleanse the soul.” This guy knows what he’s talking about.

I will be the first one to admit that all of these are easier said than done. But just try it. Have other ways to break out of a lonely funk? #BBBLoneliness

NATALIEHEADSHOT1

Natalie Scicolone, Assistant to the Fashion Editor of Marie Claire

Name: Natalie Scicolone
Occupation: Assistant to Zanna Roberts Rassi, Marie Claire Senior Fashion Editor

B: How did you start working at Marie Claire?
Natalie: I actually interned at Marie Claire my senior year of college. I didn’t think I got the internship – I stressed myself out to the extreme, but they just told me keep an open mind, and I ended up interning here and absolutely falling in love with this industry and especially Marie Claire. When I graduated college I moved back to the city, and it took me a few weeks, but something opened up at Marie Claire and I interviewed, and I couldn’t be happier as Zanna’s assistant.

B: What did you go to school for?
Natalie: I originally went to school for journalism but then switched my major to retail and fashion and also minored in business and sales. It’s kinda the same realm.

B: Did you learn more in school or on the job?
Natalie: I definitely learned more on the job. Stuff that I do in this job you can’t learn in school. I mean, school gave me a great base for being professional, and I obviously learned a ton and I applied myself…I was constantly learning at school, but what I do here is completely different and things that no one can really teach you.

B: How long is a normal day for you?
Natalie: It is a lot of work – nothing like The Devil Wears Prada, though, because Zanna is an absolute angel. I’m the luckiest person alive to be working for her. But I enjoy working. There’ve been times where it’ll be late and Zanna will find out I’m working and she’ll be, like, “Go home!” So, it is a lot of work, but then again I love it so much that I don’t really think of it like that.

B: Have you ever cried on the job? (Or had to leave, cry, and come back. :))
Natalie: I probably shouldn’t admit this, but definitely. Anyone who tells you they haven’t cried is totally lying. We were packing for my first cover shoot with Zanna and it was during Fashion Week. There were so many things going on, and as soon as everyone left for the night, I was in the fashion closet by myself, and I just had this little breakdown. But sometimes it takes that breakdown and I snap out of it. Sometimes you just need to get it out of your system.

B: How do you get through your worst work day?
Natalie: Honestly, I just remind myself that this opportunity is such an amazing one and I feel so lucky and blessed to have it. Even on the worst day I remind myself that this is only something I could have dreamed of a year ago. Reminding myself of that really helps me snap out of whatever mood I’m in and makes me focus.

B: You work for a pretty bougie magazine, and I’m sure that requires dressing pretty classy everyday. Do you have a favorite wardrobe staple for always looking your best?
Natalie: I have this big obsession with denim shirts. I don’t know if people would consider it a staple but it’s definitely my staple. I have to remind myself that I don’t need a denim shirt in every shade of denim.

B: What’s the one piece in your wardrobe you couldn’t live without?
Natalie: It’s hard to name one piece! I can’t live without my shoes and my jewelery. Especially live-in jewelry – things that I get that are nice and I keep on all the time.

B: Do you have any tips for girls who want to look like a fashion editor but can’t afford designer pieces?
Natalie: It’s all about being really creative and open. There are so many pieces from runway that trickle down into mainstream that we see at our favorite stores like Zara, H&M, and Topshop. It’s about going out and looking. Guaranteed you are able to put a look together for under $100 if you take the time to really search. I think it’s definitely more available than people think!

B: Do you have any advice for other young women as they leave college and are looking for a job?
Natalie: I feel like I could write a book! I think interning is really important. But besides that, one of the most important things is that it just takes one person to give you that chance. And when you get that chance you have to prove to them that they made the right decision. It’s about that one person saying, “I believe in her. I see something in her. I think she can do this.” So, when you get that chance, you really have to own it and not let it go.

B: What’s the best part of this time in your life?
Natalie: Everything! I think the best thing is that this is a time in my life, or in anyone’s life, where we are so young that we can be or do or go wherever [we] want. This is the time when you get to make a name for yourself and it’s up to you how you do it. It’s refreshing to know that if you got an opportunity in London, there would be nothing stopping someone our age from doing it! Now’s the time when you can actually just go and not look back.

B: What are you struggling most with right now?
Natalie: I think that if I had to classify a struggle I think it would be being away from my family and closest friends. That gets hard. But then I remind myself I’m in New York
City, I’m 23 years old… you know? That helps me get past that. But sometimes you just want that home cooked meal.

B: Who’s your biggest cheerleader?
Natalie: My mom. She is the most supportive and inspiring woman known to mankind. I moved here without anything lined up and I feel like most mothers would be like, “Oh, no, you’re not doing that.” But she completely stood by me and I can’t thank her enough for being a cheerleader for me.

B: What’s your dream gig?
Natalie: To be honest, I’m still figuring it out. I don’t think I necessarily have a dream gig. At the moment, what I’m doing right now – being Zanna’s assistant – is my dream gig. I can’t even express how happy I am and how much I love working with her and for her. I’ll figure the rest out as I go.

CHIVALRY_1

Chivalry Is Dead And We Have Killed It

It seems like everytime I get on Facebook there is meme after meme talking about how all guys are jerks and chivalry is dead. They may be a little dramatic, but I would agree that there is truth to the idea.

It used to be that every man, starting when he was old enough to do so, held the door for a lady (Yes, “lady”. You reap what you sow, right?). Chairs were pulled out and jackets were put around the shoulders of a lass right and left. Now if your date does anything that can be construed as chivalry, you’re ready to elope before dessert.

I’m no expert when it comes to those days gone by but I think most ladies have first hand experience on both sides of the chivalrous coin.

So what happened?

I won’t get into that crazy psychology jargon. But I will say that maybe all is not lost. Maybe the remnants of gentlemanliness still remain. Many will attest to the fact that he is a rare breed of gentleman but when you find him, you’ll discover he was well worth the wait. (But that’s a tangent).

But back to those gentlemanly remnants. Of course, a man should open the car door for his date and he better have asked her Dad for permission (See He Should Ask Your Dad First).  But we don’t live in a world of soda fountains, petticoats and Lucky Strikes. We’ve got Facebook, iPhones and 3D movies. So maybe the chivalry that goes into this tech high world is a little bit different. Maybe it’s opening doors and a good morning text message. Just a thought. Do you think we need to bring back chivalry?

JoanofARC

Introducing: Women You’ve Never Heard Of

Let’s talk about great women. Women who did incredible things, who broke barriers, who looked stunning doing it. The Joan of Arcs, the Gertrude Ederles, women like Margaret Thatcher and Rosa Parks. These icons have inspired generations of young women to never give up, to stand for something, and to do great things.

But we aren’t all supposed to courageously defend the Falkland Islands, swim the English channel (Who’d want to do that?), or liberate our country from English domination. If every women was called to do that, a lot of incredibly valuable things would never get done. We won’t all be burned at the stake before age twenty, but what young woman doesn’t need to be courageous moving away from home, starting her first job, or having her first child? Maybe I’m going out on a limb here, but just because those actions aren’t written in the history books, doesn’t mean that they are any less valuable.

The women who do make it into the history books were given incredible opportunities to use their gifts and talents, but just because our circumstances are less glamorous doesn’t mean we should live our lives with less fortitude, love, and perseverance.

Every moment we are given is a gift, right? Shouldn’t the things we do in those moments be done with purpose and conviction regardless of the task?

The incredible Mother Teresa said, “We cannot all do great things, but we can do small things with great love.” Yeah, she won a Nobel Prize, but, before that, she was just a little nun from a tiny town in Albania. And she did small things with great love.

So, let’s get the discussion started. We are dedicating this column to women who have done incredible things. Maybe you’ve never heard of them, maybe you have. Maybe you’d like to tell us about a woman you know who is doing incredible things with humility, love, and generosity and expecting nothing in return. Here it is. The column of Women You’ve Never Heard Of.