Ladies, relax…Sarah is here to provide reassurance that you are NOT “the only one.” Give a hearty chuckle at these embarrassing moments your fellow ladies have experienced to which I’m sure you can relate. Feel free to add your own…
1. Scenario: The moment you exit a restroom stall from going #2 and make eye contact with the smiling lady approaching to take your place.
What you’re thinking: Oh man, she is NOT going to be smiling in a minute!
2. Scenario: You just got out of an interview or meeting. When you see your beau, he interrupts your first comment to tell you, “There’s something in your teeth.” Sure enough a blackberry skin from your smoothie hours before rests happily in front.
What you’re thinking: Why did NO ONE tell me this before? They were probably dying of pity.
3. Scenario: You are on Facebook chat and see your friend “typing.” So you stop. So does she.
What you’re thinking: What life-altering question was she about to ask and why did she chicken out?
4. Scenario: Someone introduces you by the wrong name.
What you’re thinking: Ah! Dude, you just bought a ticket to the awkward express. So sorry!
5. Scenario: You just got a great new haircut and no one notices.
What you’re thinking: Unbelievable, I want my money back. **OR** Is everyone blind?! I look amazing!
6. Scenario: You are parting from a business lunch and after saying “Goodbye” embark onward in the same direction as your companion.
What you’re thinking: Should we keep talking? Should I turn, pretend I’m parked somewhere else?
7. Scenario: Someone too far ahead of you holds the door open.
What you’re thinking: Maybe I should do that half-committed limp/walk to show I’m grateful… But I’d rather take my sweet time gliding in full dignity.
8. Scenario: You’re on Facebook and see a friend is online. You write, “hey.” They go offline.
What you’re thinking: I’m really hoping that was coincidence.
9. Scenario: That awkward moment when you are singing Happy Birthday to someone you don’t know.
What you’re thinking: Shoot…What’s his name? “Happy Birthday dear **mumble**.” Success.
10. Scenario: You were the last one to let go of a hug with a guy.
What you’re thinking: Dangit! Now he’s going to think I like him.
11. Scenario: You open a card containing money or a check.
What you’re thinking: Read the card, read the card….show them you really care about the message.
12. Scenario: Someone is blocking your desired grocery item with their cart.
What you’re thinking: Maybe if I act intensely interested in the surrounding items and slowly shift closer, they’ll move.
13. Scenario: You type out an elaborate text to your crush.
What you’re thinking: Is that too involved, too dramatic, too gushy? Maybe it’s too cold? How’s he going to read it? Did I ration my exclamation marks? (You text back “Haha”)
14. Scenario: You are about to walk into a store wearing something that you bought there.
What you’re thinking: Maybe I shouldn’t go in… they’ll think I stole it.